Do You Need Encouragement?

I received a card from Miss Nina today and it made my whole day. It got me to thinking, perhaps I should resume my card ministry. I enjoyed sending cards out every month. Would you like a card to lift you up every once in awhile? If so, send me your address in a message or you can email it to me at f8ithgal@yahoo.com (do not leave your address as a comment) and I will add you to my card mailing list. This isn't spam mail, it is meant to uplift and encourage those I care about! I look forward to being a part of your encouraging team in 2014!

~ Chelle
12/28/13

Out of My Comfort Zone

Everyone has a comfort zone that they feel safe in.  I stayed in the same position for years because it was in my comfort zone.  My needs were being met but I wasn't really living, somewhere in life I had begun to just survive.  God began to stir my spirit and force me outside of that comfort zone.  I was thinking on this today as I followed up on cash calls.  I am not a salesman, customer service is my strength and one reason I am so good at what I do.  These calls are uncomfortable for me because they are an area of weakness.  Why would God lead me into a position of weakness?  To grow!  It was clear I wasn't going to grow on my own so He had to move me outside of where I was comfortable.  Looking back, my comfort zone had turned into more of a rut zone.  I was stuck and quickly growing more unsettled and discouraged within, yet refusing to move from what I knew into the unknown.   While what I knew may not be making me happy, it was safe.  I made the sale I was calling on and God began speaking to my heart.  Looking back on my life He has had to "force" me from my comfort zone several times.  It would appear this is never an easy lesson for me and one God always has to teach me the hard way.  God is patient, always nudging me along as a loving Father would.  I give Him all the glory for where I have been, where I am, and wherever He is taking me.  It's funny I'm outside of comfort zone in so many ways right now, yet completely at peace within.  I'm growing and I pray others can be encouraged and see God's light shining through me as I set out on this leg of my journey.

~ Chelle
   12/27/13

Christmas Thoughts

I thought about a poem, perhaps a story, but what I really need to post about is a heart full of love.  It is so heavy for those we have lost this year, family members that are struggling with demons as I write this, sickness in so many homes, and needs that only God can meet.  Every person I know is going through some kind of trial.  The enemy never sleeps, his evil minions roam seeking to destroy on his behalf. The devil knows his prey very well and he knows the Word of God even better.  He knows our every weakness and uses those things to twist, crowd, and distort our thinking.  However, our Heavenly Father has sent his son and Holy Spirit to intercede for us.  We are not perfect, we are not going to pass every trial the enemy throws in our path.  But I can promise our God will use it for our better, for our growth, and for His glory.  Sure, the devil can win a small battle every once in awhile, but we have read God's Word and we know how the story ends.  God wins the war.  It doesn't matter what you have done or where you are in your life.  Jesus was born to cleanse our sins and lift us from the muck and mire this world generates, all you have to do is ask.  Jesus loves you so much he died for you and He is ready and waiting for you to come back to His fold.  Being under His covering doesn't prevent the enemy's snares, in fact, it pretty much guarantees them.  But is also guarantees your protection, unconditional love, and forgiveness when you slip.  It promises you He will NEVER leave or forsake you, it ensures your needs are met, it thwarts the devil's plans and turns them to your good.  Being a child of God also gives you a entire army to stand behind you in prayer and prayer is the most powerful weapon on earth.  Don't allow the enemy to steal your joy today.  I don't care if you are sick, homeless, or don't have a gift under the tree look to God and say thank YOU Abba Father for giving Your son for my life, thank YOU Jesus for being born just to die for me, thank YOU Holy Spirit for being my comforter and guide!  Child of God praise Him out of your depression, praise Him from the streets, praise Him in your sickness because it is HIM that is going to lift you out of whatever you are going through.  I'm praying for you.  Don't be afraid or ashamed to ask for prayer, the covering of the saints is powerful.  If you don't want to leave your request here send it to me in a private message.  I'll request prayer on your behalf and not mention your name.  There is power in the name of Jesus and power in prayer.  We need each others prayer and support during these hard times.  We should be building each other up and supporting each other.  I'm here for each of you.  Merry Christmas and God bless!

~ Chelle
    12/25/13

Ramblings

I had so many things on my mind to write about, yet as I sit here watching the lights on our Christmas tree they all seem to elude me.  My mind is tired of running and I find myself fighting sleep as I try to force myself to write.  You must, after all, do just that if you want your talent to improve and writing nightly is a habit I am determined to pick up. The music is playing the soft soothing melodies of Soundscapes as I watch the icicles glisten against the lights.  There is a simple quiet beauty to it that I can not explain.  My life is by far not perfect but I know it is a work in progress guided by God's hands so everything will be alright.  My bank account is not overflowing but all of my needs have been met.  I have moments where I break down and cry and find myself questioning why to so many things, isn't that a part of being human?  You never really know what someones smile might be hiding.  Storms sweep through everyone's life, some are just better at hiding it than others. I know what it is like to be in a room full of people yet you feel as if your the only one.  I've said I'm okay when inside I am dying.  I've put on a positive face when I really want to smash something or someone.  These are things we all go through.  We are not pretending to be perfect or putting on a front for the world to see, we just cope in different ways.  So many times I have smiled through the tears and came out stronger.  Not sure where this came from tonight, just sharing what's on my heart. It's important to know your not alone, I'm not alone.  We are all just trying to get through this thing called life.

~ Chelle
    12/20/13

A Matter of Perspective

It's all about perspective. I was looking around our place when that thought really started to take root.  One may see our trailer as a little tin can.  It's old, battered, yet still standing.  It needs to be painted, we don't have much room, the floors need to be redone... the list goes on.  Then I began to reflect on the love within it's walls.  It suddenly became cozy, our furniture gives it heart, our pictures on the walls brings our family of far near.  Our small little yard has flowers that randomly spring up, we have a peaceful place to cook out, a relaxing place to sit.  My "little tin can" was suddenly transformed before my eyes.  I saw serenity, beauty, character.

Isn't life that way?  We can choose to focus on every bad thing that is happening in our lives or we can shift our focus to what is going right.  When we dwell on the negative it multiples.  Not only does it multiply in our thoughts but it starts to influence those around us.  A frown breeds a frown while a smile is contagious. No one can be all sunshine.  You have to experience some storms to appreciate the beauty of the rainbows that follow.  The challenge is not to fall into a rut of despair that lingers for days, months, and for some years.  It's important to recognize the negative patterns of thinking and to make a conscious effort to find the positive.  It can be a hard habit to break.  I caught myself today and in just a second my mind set had been completely turned around and my mood with it.  The next time the negativity tries to swallow you take a minute to stop and reflect on what is right.  Again, it's all about perspective.

~ Chelle
    12/19/13

Goal Update: Week 3

I'm a couple of days late but I lost 3 pounds!  That's not bad considering all of the candy my mom made last week.  I have been writing steady, not every day but close to it.   I can't lie, still slacking in exercise and studying but trying to improve. I want to give a HUGE thank you everyone from the "like" of my page to your words of encouragement.  I am blessed to have you and you are the fuel that keeps me from giving up!

~ Chelle
    12/18/13

Keep Going

I watched the leaves on a tree outside of my office turn from green to shades of bright orange and red.  When the light hit it just right the tree appeared to be on fire.  The bright shades eventually dulled to yellows and browns.  The winds of the changing seasons began to pick up and each day my tree became a little more bare.  Now it stands tall, completely exposed. 

There is a tree beside of this bare lady that seems to be unhindered by the weather.  Her leaves are lush green, full and flourishing. Quite a contrast to the bare branches beside of it that have given way to winter.  As I was watching the two trees, a flock of birds started to fly over.  Which tree would they choose to rest for a spell?  They covered the bare branches, not a one landed on the tree covered with the leaves.  They only stayed for a minute before flying on.  The exposed branches offered them a better vantage point to continue along their journey.  It gave them a place to rest and warm in the sun.

Life reminds me of those trees.  Had it been a different season, the flock may have chosen the shade that the full tree had to offer.  That bare tree was more useful to the birds in this season.  We may be in a dry season and can not understand where we are going, but God could be using it to inspire someone else.  Everything in life happens for a reason and we are all full of usefulness.  We may not always know that reason or our purpose is, but I can promise you God does.  You may never know the impact you are having on someone else, keep going when you think you can't.  There may be eyes watching you and your journey will keep them going too.

~ Chelle
   12/16/13

Lies, Lies, Lies

My momma raised me to be an honest gal, maybe that is why I continue to be amazed at the dishonesty I see everywhere.  Some people seem to have the ability to lie instilled in them, as if it is a gift given from the devil at birth.  When these lies are told in front of little eyes it is an ability they pick up and so the cycle continues.  When I was a child I got my bottom busted if I was caught telling a lie.  It wasn't an art to be handed down to each generation, it was an offense punishable by swift action of a switch.  It wasn't child abuse, it was teaching me what was acceptable and what was not.  What should be considered child abuse is teaching multiple children to be so dishonest.  I know, I'm on a rant tonight.  I'm just sick to my stomach as a watch a mother of 5 tell so many lies.  She lies to her children, her family, to every single person in her life, including herself.  So many lies have been told that the truth can no longer be found.  It's just sad.  Watching Cops, you see the police take drugs out of a person's pocket and hear, "That's not mine, I didn't even know it was there."  Really?!  Politicians lie publicly and actually make a career of it.  Companies lie to their employees, TV ads lie to the general public, the news "twist" the truth to meet their station's agenda.  Lies, lies, lies.  It's time we take a stand and stop letting it be the norm to lie.  Vote the Politicians out of office, boycott products, turn the channel.  If there are no consequences the lies will continue and if they are rewarded they will be taught to future generations. Is the truth too much to ask for?  I don't think so, but it has to start at home and work it's way outward.  We may not be able to control the lies outside of our homes but we can refuse to make them wanted house guest inside of them.  Just a thought.

~ Chelle
    12/14/13

The Truth About People Is...

Time always reveals who is true and who is real
A small circle will love you, a much larger one will pretend to care
A handful will offer support when times are stormy, the rest will hide until the sunshine returns
A select few will be there to lift you up, a larger population is anticipating your fall
Some will talk directly to you, while others whisper behind your back
Who is real seems to out number who's not as the years pass by
We come to realize who are our friends and who the enemy is that hides within our camp
Time teaches us to value who is true and who is real

~ Chelle
    12/13/13

Just a Prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You for this day and this opportunity to come before Your throne.  My timeline is littered with sadness, sickness, and financially destitute situations.  Father God, so many are in need of a direct touch from You.  I pray for Your peace over them in the midst of trouble.  Send one of Your children into their path to help guide them back into light.  Cause a smile to touch their soul and lighten their heart.  Comfort the sick and give strength to the family and friends caring for them.  Wrap Your arms around them and cause them to feel Your presence in the most profound way.  Lift those in destitute situations up out of the pit of despair. Guide their every spending and touch their finances to meet their every need.  Bless those reading and praying in agreement to this prayer.  Thank You for being a God who is faithful and caring, who listens to our needs. Thank You Jesus for holding us through the sadness, healing us in the sickness, and providing for us when there seems to be no other way.  In Jesus precious name I pray. Amen.

~ Chelle
    12/12/13

The Fog of Depression

Depression is like a fog settling over your life.  You feel the shift in the air, you see it bearing down, you can even hear the warning signs coming, yet you just can't seem to escape it.  That haze has centered over me the last couple of days. I can't really explain where it came from and I don't think any medication could have held it off.  It's almost as if it alters your very thinking.  You start to see things in exaggeration.  When you dwell on the negative it starts to spread and like a fog and it will cover every nook and cranny of your life. It begins to filter out the positive, forcing it to become almost hazy as it tries to smoother the things out that keep you going.   Millions of people suffer from this every day, most are ashamed to admit it has seeped into their life.  Many are embarrassed by the medications they take to control it, they don't want society to think they are crazy or abnormal.  I become skilled at hiding it and I have been on medication for years because of it. I figured as long as I am making my life an open book I might as well put it all out there and pray my story encourages someone else. 

The Holidays can be a very difficult time and depression really hits so many throughout this season.  Getting this fog to lift from someone's life isn't easy.  I recently found that haze clouding my thoughts, influencing my decisions. Today my fog lifted and reality started to peak through.  A friend was being swallowed by that same fog and was ready to give up her life into it.  Reality check.  Life is fragile.  This precious person couldn't see her own worth.  The devil is a liar. We ALL have value.  God made each of us after his own image and he made us each unique and gifted us with special abilities. I'm thankful God could look through the fog, past "me", into "me" and still use "me" for Him.  Yes, the fog cleared today.  That's not to say it will not come back.  Just as the weather changes it is bound to happen but I am thankful to know God has power over the fog and His light will pull me (and my friend) through it.  God Bless!

~ Chelle
    12/10/13

Weekly Goal Update

Where has the first week gone?  It flew by. I kind of dreaded this update because I didn't accomplish everything I wanted to and it seems the weight is going to come off so slow (too slow).  I had to remind myself, part of doing this so openly is to show it can be done.  Not that is easy, but that it is possible.  Not that I won't slip, but that I will NOT quit.  Amazingly I lost 1 pound last week.  I stayed within my calories every day but one. I exercised 3 days, so I need to pick it up by 1-2 days this week. I am still finding it hard to study consistently but I am improving.  I have written 8 out of 9 days this month.   They may not be long or award winning pieces, but it has definitely been a positive start.  I have a long ways to go, but I am well on my way to the new me (that is actually the old me).  Thank you all for your support and a special thanks to my coach, Nina.  The support you guys have given me has motivated me to keep going when I think I can't.  You guys are the best and I will keep pressing!

~ Chelle
    12/9/13

Happiness, Just A Thought

Happiness.  I have been contemplating that word a lot lately.  We tend to associate happiness with people or places but doesn't it really have to start from within?  How can you be happy with others if you do not like yourself?  How can you make others happy if that happiness didn't first come from somewhere deep inside of you?  As for things, they are fleeting so any happiness caused is temporary.   Recently, someone close to me said I seem to be more on edge lately. He was right, I have been. I have become so worried with trying to see everyone else was happy that it began to weigh on my own happiness.  I love where I am in my life.  It sounds silly, but I am happy spending a Monday night laying on the couch watching wrestling with Billy.  I may grumble from time to time, but I find myself smiling as I wash the dishes.  I have found a joy and peace in keeping the house causes a smile to cross my face. I am enjoying this time in my life, right now right here.  Perhaps instead of worrying about if someone else is happy I should allow my happiness to radiate outward and let it act as a reassurance that things are going to be alright.  It took me a long time to get to this place in my life.  It hasn't been a perfect journey, but God has blessed every step of the way on this journey I have taken.  I should wear this smile proudly as a reflection of what God has done and is doing in me.  I want all my family and friends to have the peace in their lives that produces the genuine happiness that is rooted in your very being, but I can't force that happiness on them.  Sadly, some people are satisfied in turmoil, others enjoy drama.  I'll love you, I'll be here for you, I'll pray for you, but I won't let worry hinder my smile.  God is good and my smile should be a light drawing others in.  Be blessed.

~ Chelle
    12/8/13

Reflection

It is no wonder I am tired, my mind is constantly running.  I would be pencil thin if I could figure out how to turn that energy into a weight loss program. The good, the bad, the indifferent... it all plays out when I least expect it.  Memories rush in and I'm left thinking, "where did that come from?"  I had a dream about an event clear back in high school a couple of weeks ago and I spent days reflecting on it. So many times I hear people say what they would change if they could.  There are many things I guess I could wish to have changed but in reality they molded me into the woman I am today. Everything we experience becomes like little stepping stones toward our future.  We can learn from those "stones" and allow them to move us higher or we can dwell on them, turning them into boulders that block our path.  The stones that seem to pierce the hardest are often the stones that propel us further.  They allow us to grow and to be a light to others who may be on that same dark path.  They force us to become stronger for our journey and act as a testimony reflecting what great things God can do.  The biggest stones give us something to appreciate, they add value when reflecting upon where you were, where you are, and where you are headed.   Bad choices last a moment in time, if you wake to see another day you have been given a chance to turn things around.  Reflection is good to remind us of how far we have come, but don't let something from your past block your future.  Bust that boulder into pieces and use them to step up into your future.  Cement those loose stones and move on.  Tell your past, thank you for teaching and preparing me for my journey. Tell your future, challenge excepted.  As for your present, just live.  You never know what day will be your last.

~ Chelle
    12/6/13

The Little Things

It's the little things that mean the world to me. The way he touches my foot with his at night to feel me close. Buying me a bottle of Figi water because he knows wine doesn't interest me.  It's simply laying his hand over me at night, giving me comfort to know he needs me near. Flowers for no special occasion or buying my coke zero just because puts a smile on my face.  His every day actions mean so much.  He forces me to focus when silly things start to trouble me. I love the way he looks at me so serious and them caves into a smile. It's cooking my favorite food when he knows I've had a rough day that turns it around.  He keeps me grounded when life tries to uproot me. These "little" things begin to snowball into an avalanche of gratitude. Thank you Billy Schirmer for being you!

~ Chelle
   12/5/13

Just A Drop

I am transparent.  My size varies depending on the storm.  I can rush down like a flood or trickle as if I were being sifted.  I might roar like a thousand lions or tread lightly with soft little taps.  I may cleanse the land or renew your spirit.   My sound may lull you to sleep or quickly draw you from one.  I can be soothing or nerve racking.  It all depends on how you see me.  I could be a drop of rain falling from the sky or a tear falling from your eye...

~ Chelle
    12/4/13

Pleasantly Plumply

I recently started by online weight loss album and made it public for all to see.  This wasn't a decision I took lightly.  People can be cruel and words painful.  Almost all of the pictures I have taken over the last several years have been face shots, rarely ever do you see a pic below my shoulders.  I began to contemplate on this.  The reason is clear, I was embarrassed for others to see me.  I was ashamed of my weight and my appearance.  This really started to trouble me.  If I can not be happy in my own skin there is something very wrong. 

Then I started scrolling through pictures of my friends and family and noticed several with nothing but face shots, some have never had a picture of themselves posted at all.  I began to wonder why this was.  Sure some may not have access to change their pictures, but I can't help but wonder how many are bothered by their own appearance.  Perhaps they feel too fat, too thin, too short, too tall... too anything that causes them to shy away from showing others themselves. 

Our society places a heavy emphasis on appearance, yet how someone views another person's appearance is completely subjective.  A person can be pretty when you first meet and after you get to know them their beauty somehow fades as their not so nice inner appearance takes over.  Beauty truly comes in all shapes, all sizes, and inner beauty can certainly shine through.  We all see beauty in different ways.  Billy sees me as beautiful, he sees me through his eyes in a way that I sometimes don't see myself.

I thought on this for awhile before deciding to post my fat pic, or pleasantly plumply pic, as I prefer to say.  I wanted to show the real me, completely raw and exposed.  I have my "pretty" days and then I have those days where I just feel hideous. I am a real person and I want other real people to know they are NOT alone. They can join "Team Michelle" (thank you Lisa) and be happy with yourself and motivate to change what your are not happy with.  So please join me in this journey and don't be afraid to post pics of the real you, the beautiful you!

~ Chelle
    12/3/13

Accountability

I have a fire lit under me, now I need to keep the flames going.  I've given a lot of thought in how to accomplish this.  This life change is not going to happen unless I am held accountable to my goals.  Nina Siders has graciously agreed to be my accountability partner.  We will help keep the flames of change burning for each other. 

To make changes, I need to know what I want to change and how I will accomplish it. Nina will also need something to hold me accountable for, so here we go...

First, I want and need to lose weight. Before leaving Florida, I was diagnosed with diabetes. This runs in my family, yet I felt a great deal of shame at first.  I truly believed I had brought it on myself.  I was overweight, not eating right, and not really taking care of myself. Perhaps it was my fault this family illness was upon me. Honestly, I still struggle with this, but enough is enough.  My Doctor told me it was early and I could control it through diet and exercise.  I alone have to the ability to change it myself or continue down a path towards medication.  Today, I choose to do something about it.  My goal is to lose 1 to 1-1/2 pounds a week.  I have chosen to accomplish this journey through the Lose It App. This is a self tested method that I know works for me, I just need the will power to see it through.  I will stay within my calorie count and exercise at least 3-5 days a week.  I will also work on changing my eating habits by watching my portion control, eating balanced meals and including diabetic friendly snacks.

Second, I want to be a better writer. I will stop procrastinating and complete the writing course I am currently enrolled in.  The same course I paid for, completed a few chapters, and stopped.  I will also write everyday.  To get better at something you have to do it and do it often. The only way to be a writer is to write, so no matter how many or few words I spill, I need to make this a daily priority.  I will also keep a journal of my progress.

Third, I need to be more financially stable.  Our move was difficult and it took the help of two very important people.  These two people were lifesavers and owing them weighs heavy on my mind.  I want to get these loans paid off, put an end to payday loans, and start saving.  To accomplish this, Billy is going to do the shopping.  Seriously, I know this is a weakness of mine and until I can get a handle on it I will not do any shopping unless I come armed with a list to shop from (and I will only buy what is on that list). The days of reckless spending are over.

Finally, I started taking courses with Ames International School of Ministry.  I decided on the paid program, paid for the course and then guess what I did?  That's right, got too busy and just stopped.  I want to follow through and complete this program.  This involves a lot of memorization and that is hard for me.  Perhaps that is subconsciously why I quit.  However, completing this has been one of my heart's desires and it is time to suck it up and get it done.  I will commit at least 1-2 hours a day to this course.  I will put the Scriptures I need to memorize on note cards and review them several times a day.

There you have it.  These are the goals that I need to be held accountable for.  Why have I shared them with you?  There are several reasons.  I want you to help Nina hold me accountable.  I also know I will need encouragement at times to stay on the right path.  However, perhaps most important, I want to show those people who think they can't do something that they can.  You can lose weight, you can do something you have always dreamed of, you can be financially stable.  You can do ANYTHING you set your mind to.  I will update my page weekly to share my progress.  If you think I'm slacking, call me on it.  A special thank you to Nina and each of you for taking this journey with me.  Let's do this!

~ Chelle
    12/2/13

Serious Changes

I see so many things going on in the world around me. As I watch family, friends, acquaintances, and even people I do not personally know passing, I realize time waits for no man. Sickness lay in wait for so many that will be completely unexpected.  Freak accidents will cut lives short. Crimes will end yet others.  Life is precious, every hour, every minute... not one second is promised.  I sit here sipping my coffee on this quiet morning contemplating that profound fact when suddenly the sound of birds singing break the silence. The winds of change sweep through our little retro haven as they chirp, "wake up, wake up."

Too many of us are so busy trying to exist we forget to live.  Not only do we forget to live we begin to become so indrenched in the daily routine of life we just let time slip on by and our dreams, our goals with it.  I began to think on this and over and over the word "serious" kept creeping into my mind, the word "change" began to permeate through my spirit.  My time is now, am I going to let it slip by or reach out and grab the things I truly desires?  It is past time to change the way I think and get serious about the things my heart truly wants.

I need to lose weight, lose it.  I want to write, do it.  I want my finances to be more than just getting by, make it happen.  We complicate things with silly details when it's really simple, just do it.  Get off my bottom and exercise and eat right.  Stop being lazy and write something every day.  Quit reckless spending.  No more excuses.  No more wasting time that you can't get back.  No more taking time for granted.

God has placed me here right now.  He gave me this body, I should take care of it.  He gave me a talent, I should cultivate and share it. He has provided me with everything I need to do more than just survive, I should take advantage of it.  He can't do it for me, it's time for me to get serious and make life changes.  Changes in the way I eat, changes in my habits, changes in my spending... changes in my very thinking.  It can't be a New Year's Resolution that fades away, the changes have to come from deep within my spirit.  Changes that God has equipped me with strength and determination to carry out.  Changes that will be encouraged by family and friends.  Changes that allow me to be happy and shine as the woman God would have me to be.  Serious life altering changes... challenge accepted.  Stay tuned as my life transforms and I blossom into the person I was born to be.

~ Chelle
    12/1/13