# Peace

Peace can be defined as a state of tranquility or quiet.  It was our Made to Crave Bible study word of the week and poses an interesting question, is it possible to make peace with the realities of our bodies?  I'm not sure about you but before I began my the journey to the new old me, I don't know that I have ever been at peace with my body.  In high school and into college, I felt I had too many curves.  It seemed guys wanted a pretty thin thing on their arms and this girl looked like an hour glass.  As I got older, the pounds began to mount and any positive image of myself seemed to deteriorate with each pound gained.  No, there was not much "quiet" in my weight, on some level it has always screamed your not enough, or better perhaps yelled, you are too much!

Now I find myself on this journey to the old new me.  I'm not at all happy with my weight, but I would I be happier if I was back to my high school size?  I may feel that I look better, there may be a level of superficial happiness, but peace?  What I am finding is that peace comes from deeper within.  I have had to face and defeat those demons within me to achieve peace. Those demons that have convinced me I'm not good enough or pretty enough. Loving me isn't just all 226 pounds of the physical me, it's loving the me within.  A state of tranquility can not truly happen until I have found peace within myself.

Am I completely there?  No.  Am I on my way? Absolutely!  Most days I like who I see smiling back at me in the mirror.  Sure, I have my "fat" days where I look in the mirror with a slight frown. On those days, I am conditioning myself to say, "the devil is a liar.  You are beautiful in your own skin!"  It's a process from the inside out.  It's reminding myself not to believe the enemy's lies or even what a portion of society deems pretty.  I have found as I make peace within I find myself making peace at the image staring back at me. I am beautiful and so are you!

~ Chelle Prell, #f8ithgal
    https://www.facebook.com/f8ithgal
    2/9/14